Jaron's Dreams
| December 30, 2009, 12:52 PM The Girl, the Witch, and the Tree-Spell |
| I had to write this one down, because it was pretty awesome. I had a dream two nights ago that I was going to GC again, and I was a single guy looking for a girl. While standing by Burritt, I was recommended by a friend for this certain girl who was single and rather pretty. She came from a very conservative family. They started describing her standards for a guy. She needed a guy who would be satisfied with courtship. She needed a guy who would be satisfied with no physical contact of any kind. She needed a guy who had to ask her parent's permission for almost any relationship decision with her. She needed a guy who had, in essence, "Kissed Dating Goodbye." I told my friend that I was extremely wary of this, because I'd been burned by this sort of nonsense in the past.
She came by, and I dropped my feelings of uncertainty long enough to walk her to a house. When I got into the house, I had this feeling that the house was full of old, buried memories. I began to try to use the magical power of words (a dream, mind you; I don't believe in this nonsense in real life) to pick up objects. Though I didn't think it would work, I concentrated on certain objects and said the word "Cehron" or "Cehthon," or something close to that. This was an old word that meant, "Come Here." Finally one of the objects flew uncertainly towards me. Excited by this newly discovered power, I began practicing on other objects. Some came and others didn't, but I was starting to get good at it. Suddenly a witch showed up at the house, and I was outside with the girl again. The witch threw this long strangely-worded spell at the girl. The girl screamed. Her scream started to turn scratchy as she began to elongate and grow branches. Eventually she turned into a tree, her face imprinted in the bark still twisted in a look of horror. (This transmogrification looked remarkably like Thom Yorke's in the video of "There There.") The witch ran out back through the house, and I chased her. I made it a point to memorize the spell she used on the girl. I used the spell on the witch, and she turned into a tree herself. I ran back out to the girl and was able to turn her back to a normal girl again using another spell. How did I get this spell? No one knows. After freeing the girl, I learned from others that she had been missing for 5-6 years. To the people who told me this, this was unfortunate, because she was an up and coming star of one or two of the colleges cheesy movies. Now she would be able to star in other cheesy movies. She went promptly to do just that. And that's about all I remember. My favorite part is the middle. The parts around the edges make absolutely no sense. |